Happy Hanukka!
December 15, 2006 | General
For each night of Hanukka, a wish for the world:
1) May there be peace on earth.
2) May there be peas on my plate next to my chicken.
3) May there be peein’ in my open wounds, in the VIP room of the club I’m at late night on the ‘zeeve. (’Zeeve is the cool way to say “New Year’s Eve”)
4) May the leaders of all nations drop their arms.
5) May the leader of Switzerland drop a few pounds of chocolate in the mail to me (Fedex preferred, you can use my account #: 243-32443-8753)
6) May there be a new kind of medicine that effectively treats irritable bowel syndrome, specifically the very hard to press thru doodies that keep some people up at night and then they have to sit on the toilet re-reading old copies of the Village Voice over and over because they’re too lazy to find another magazine or god forbid a book to read during the countless hours spent on that fucking toilet. (I’m specifically thinking of a friend of mine who has to deal with this all-too-common affliction.)
7) May we hopefully get a break from Austin Powers 24/7. Yes I thought it was funny at first, “Yeah baby, let’s shag!!!” etc, but do I have to see him on every single TV show, magazine, newspaper and billboard? YOU “behave”, Austin. You’re the one who should “behave.”
May we all have a joyous and loving holiday season!
12 Responses to “Happy Hanukka!”
“Zeeve.” You, my friend, are a genius.
By Sarah on Dec 15, 2006
All right all right, you got the whole Hanooka thing out of the way, now move over minorah, Chris Kringle’s commin’ to town. Pff, dradle, give me a misseltoe and Halli Berry. GAFAW!!!!!!!!!!!
By Jambo on Dec 15, 2006
Thanks for reminding me to make plans for the ‘Zeeve.
Happy Chaka Khan!
By Santana on Dec 16, 2006
chewbacca?
heh but yeah seriously, happy hanukka… we’re actually celebrating this for the first time this year although we still don’t know the details on what you gotta do other then the candle thing. lol.
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